I went through my own divorce in 2017. It’s most of why I do this work.

Why this work

If you’re reading this before calling anyone, you probably want to know two things: whether I’ve been through a divorce myself, and whether I’ll lecture you. The first is below. The second is easier to settle in a conversation.

I’m an ’80s baby, born and raised in Seattle, where I lived most of my life. My divorce in 2017 destroyed me at the time and transformed me over time, helping me be myself more fully and frequently.

I was already a therapist when my marriage ended, and I was very good at looking fine. I kept working, kept showing up, kept being reasonable. I’d spent a long time believing that if I did enough, well enough, the feeling I was after would show up. It doesn’t work that way, and finding that out cost me a marriage. Getting through it meant sitting across from someone and finally being as unfinished as I actually was.

That’s what I recognize when a man calls me. He’s usually still functioning, often very well, and nobody watching has any idea. I don’t need you to explain why you waited. My divorce doesn’t make me an expert on yours, but I won’t be surprised by how much it takes out of you, or how long it goes on after the paperwork is done.

In 2023 my partner and I moved to Rhode Island to be closer to her family. We got married in 2024 and welcomed our daughter in late summer 2025.

Training and experience

Education. A BA in philosophy from Cornell, then an MA in Systems Counseling from Saybrook University in 2012. Systems counseling trains you to see a person inside the relationships they live in rather than as a set of symptoms. Divorce is a systems event almost by definition: one relationship ends and every other one around it, with your children, your friends, and your ex’s family, has to reorganize.

Community mental health. I started out working with emotionally and behaviorally disordered high school students, doing in-home family therapy for families in the juvenile justice system, and at outpatient clinics across the Seattle area. Sessions happened in kitchens and school offices, with people who hadn’t asked to be there. It’s a good education in getting to the point, and it’s why I’m comfortable with men who are skeptical of the whole idea.

Supervision and leadership. I’ve been an approved clinical supervisor in Washington and Rhode Island since 2017, supervising master’s-level interns and licensed associates. From 2022 to 2026 I was clinical director at Self Space, a boutique group practice in Seattle and Kirkland with about 35 therapists, where I trained the clinical team and oversaw casework. I still offer supervision and case consultation.

How I work

I call my approach relational-eclectic: the relationship between us is the main instrument, and I’ll use whatever works from several schools, including systems thinking, small experiments between sessions, depth psychotherapy, and Internal Family Systems (parts work). The longer version is on theoretical orientation.

Many of my clients are neurodivergent, or have a spouse, child, or family member who is. More on the therapy for neurodivergent adults page.

What I don’t do

I don’t do forensic or court-related work, family therapy, medication, or crisis and on-call coverage. What I don’t treat has the full list.

Outside of work

I love basketball and books, and taking long, meandering walks. I’m a homebody, a sucker for small comforts, and a big fan of going to bed early. My favorite place to be is tucked in the corner of a cafe, scribbling a poem. Or on the couch taking a siesta, with Amelia curled up at my feet.